Plans in 2020? Forget about it!
My Journey to Curacao Pt. 2
Hello and welcome to part two of the unbelievable journey that eventually brought me to settle in Curacao. Last week was all sunshine and rainbows - falling in love in Thailand, van life across Australia, and a whole lot of scuba diving. If you missed it or just want to recall simpler times, you can read part one here:
Unfortunately, this next part of the story is less whimsical and more pragmatic. It was February 2020, so we all know what was about to happen. Leroy and I were heading to Koh Tao so I could complete my Divemaster course and so we could have the wedding of our dreams on the beach where we met.
Thailand, The Second Time
When I first arrived in Thailand, Leroy was already in Phuket on vacation with his dad and brother for their annual boy’s trip. I met up with them at the tail end of their trip and had a blast catching up. Then it was time to return to Koh Tao.
February 2020: Happy to Be Back
The moment we arrived, still stinking of the ferry, we went to eat at Samosas. Samosas is a fantastic local restaurant on a tiny dirt side road run by Jean - arguably the kindest woman in the world.
Neither of us had seen Jean in a couple of years, but she welcomed us back with open arms, free beer, and a massive slice of her birthday cake. I was so happy to have made it back to that magical island, and it was the first time I felt at home in a long time.
We soon moved into a sweet little bungalow with sunset ocean views. The rent? Less than $400 per month. The catch? Killer stairs. My goodness, these stairs were so steep and numerous that if you forgot something when you left the house, you didn’t go back unless absolutely necessary.
And this is what I thought my biggest problem of 2020 would be—the freaking stairs up to my sea view bungalow.
I started my divemaster course at Phoenix Divers, and Leroy started working for our friends at Finsanity. So besides a little delay starting my course, due to a scooter driving lesson gone wrong, things were perfect. We were diving every day and looked forward to being in Thailand for a while.
March 2020: Planning a Koh Tao Wedding
As things were chugging along, we were starting to hear more and more about this new coronavirus thing happening in the world. At first, we didn’t take it very seriously at all. We were on a small, relatively secluded island, so the happenings of the world weren’t generally on our minds anyway.
So we continued doing what we were doing - mainly scuba diving and planning our wedding.
You see, we were planning to get married on 4/20/2020. Yes, that’s that weed holiday. And yes, we partially chose the date for that reason. Leroy thought it was hilarious, and we were guaranteed never to forget it. But far more importantly, it fell within one week of Songkran, the Thai New Year.
We had our hearts set on a Songkran bachelor/bachelorette party. Because on the Thai New Year, the entire country celebrates with a massive water fight party. Super soakers, water balloons, and even those drink buckets popular at tourist bars in Thailand make excellent water throwing vessels.
Island friends that had dispersed all over the world had plans to return for the event and then be there for the wedding. Both of our families also had big plans to travel all the way to Thailand to celebrate our nuptials. My mom, step-dad, and grandparents were coming, as were Leroy’s parents and brothers.
Spoiler alert, our families still haven’t met in person.
April 2020: What Now?
And then the world stopped. Thailand’s borders closed, businesses closed, many of our friends headed back to their home countries. So, as much as we didn’t want to, we canceled our wedding and hunkered down.
I don’t know if you guys remember just how fast travel stopped. One day there were boats coming in with tourists multiple times a day, and the next, we couldn’t leave the island unless we had a flight out of Thailand.
For a binational couple like ourselves, things were even more complicated. If we wanted to leave Thailand, where would we go? Since we were not yet married, our options were limited and complex. Neither of us could freely travel to the other’s country without official proof of a committed relationship.
We realized very quickly that the U.S. was out of the question. The restrictions for entry were too tricky, and there was no easy path for Leroy to stay in the country long term. So we set our sights on the Netherlands.
At first, there was no way I would be allowed into the Netherlands with the travel restrictions put in place. But fortunately, the Couples Separated by Travel Bans movement pushed into place an exception for long-term cohabitating couples fairly quickly.
May 2020: I Guess I’ll Go Back to School
Even with a path out of Thailand, actually leaving proved much more difficult. We had to gather “proof” of our relationship, including a rental contract establishing we lived together, which was not easy in a place where leases are rare.
For the next couple of months, every time we thought we could leave, something stood in our way. I got increasingly frustrated about feeling helpless during this time, so I made a pretty drastic decision.
I was going to go back to college.
Yes, among all the madness of lockdown, I thought, why not take some online classes just to raise the stress level a bit more. But, in all seriousness, the feeling of instability made me realize that maybe it wasn’t the best thing for both of us to work exclusively in the tourism sector.
So I enrolled at Southern New Hampshire University and started classes immediately. Going in, I had 33 credits that transferred from my first attempt at Umass eight years prior. Fourteen months and $9000 of debt later, I had a bachelor’s degree!
June 2020: Making Our Exit
Finally, with all our paperwork in order, we could buy flights to the Netherlands. But, of course, the timing coincided with a soft opening of the island where Covid restrictions mainly were lifted, and we started wishing we didn’t have to leave.
Remember, we were on an island where nobody new was allowed to go. And after a total lockdown, including early curfews, businesses were quickly dying. Naturally, we still had to wear masks, but we were in a big safe bubble. As much as that lockdown sucked, Thailand’s swift and strict policies protected us.
Once scuba diving was allowed again, I was able to finish my divemaster. And we started meeting up with friends again, though it was a bit of a shock when we realized just how many people had already left.
Out of money, we had no choice but to follow suit. Once we were given the okay from the Dutch government, we made our way to Bangkok. We finally flew out on June 15th to Amsterdam.
The Netherlands
When we landed in Amsterdam, we were relieved to be together and grateful to be with Leroy’s family. We planned to stay three months, six tops, to replenish our savings to take off again. Obviously, that’s not what happened.
Summer 2020
At first, things weren’t too bad Covid-wise in Holland. You were still allowed to go out to eat, and since summer had just begun, the weather was beautiful. I kept going to school online while Leroy worked for his dad, with whom we were also staying.
We would hang out in the garden in our free time, take walks with the doggies, and spend a lot of fun, quality time with Leroy’s family. I always like to say that the silver lining of that year was how close I got with my in-laws.
With the lifestyle we led up until that point, I hadn’t gotten the chance to get to know Leroy’s family super well. But now I truly can say they’re my family too!
September 2020: The Wedding
After the scare of almost getting separated in Thailand - we seriously considered leaving me there to wait for entry into the Netherlands - we knew time was of the essence when it came to getting married.
Weddings are less lavish in the Netherlands than in the U.S. You have to get married at the gemeente, or city hall, in a civil service, then you can have a religious ceremony afterward if you so choose. But, since this was 2020, we wanted to keep it simple anyway.
Due to Covid restrictions, we could have ten people in attendance for the ceremony and up to 30 for a private outdoor gathering. So we made an appointment at the city hall for Friday, September 18th in the afternoon, and Leroy’s dad ordered Chinese food catering for a backyard party.
On the morning of, I video called my mom. Of course, we were both crying over her not being there for my special day. But we promised that when all this was over, we would celebrate properly together in Massachusetts.
Besides not having my family there, we had a fantastic day. While culturally confusing at times, the ceremony was small and simple, just like we wanted. Then the backyard after party was a blast and honestly was better than we ever could have imagined - especially under the circumstances.
Leroy’s family and friends went above and beyond to make the day memorable for us. And now that we were married, I was able to secure residence in the Netherlands, where we ended up staying for a whole year.
The Rest of The Year
Honestly, not much else happened in the Netherlands. We went through various stages of lockdown and curfews throughout the year, with things peaking around Christmastime. I continued studying, and Leroy continued working.
Birthdays and holidays came and went without much fanfare. We looked forward to Thursday nights when we had big family dinners and weekends when we would spend time at my schoonmoeder’s - or mother-in-law’s - house.
Then when things started opening up in the spring, we started planning a trip to the U.S. It had been almost three years since I had seen my family, so we were a little overdue.
Remember how I initially planned on getting everything into one post? After this part two, I realize it will be a trilogy. The story follows a trilogy arc well enough, so you might as well embrace it.
So if you’re still following along, tune in next week for the final installment of this story, where I promise to explain how the heck we ended up in Curacao, finally!
And tune in the week after for a post about Curacao, pinky promise.